Emmi Asikainen developed severe nervous system symptoms after her partner unexpectedly ended the relationship. It takes time, friends, and introspection to cope with a sudden difference.
“I came left very surprisingly less than a year ago when I was in a relationship Elina Gustafsson with. It was a really powerful situation that felt like a sudden death. I couldn’t believe what had happened. I was trying to understand another’s crisis and I did know that there will also be difficult situations in a relationship. However, it was unacceptable that we really resigned right away.
I was the first to call my friends. Our difference was a shock to them too.
After the difference, I acted and did, but my body was in a state of intense alert. I experienced strong neurological symptoms that negatively affected sleep, eating, and confidence. At work, I pretended to be okay, but I cried in the back room. When our resignation was made public, I also had to cope with the fact that everyone else knew what had happened before I had time to deal with it myself. I had to comfort others because they were so sad for me. A couple of customers tried to hit me.
It helped me move forward that I was able to call my friends. They said I could talk about the difference for as long as I wanted. I continued the therapy I had attended before the resignation. I left the some and relied on spirituality. I read books, listened to podcasts about difference, enjoyed music, painted paintings, and meditated in absolutely shocking amounts. I got the most help from peer support when I gradually began to hear that the same thing had happened to others. I am currently studying acting and that too is a way to help myself.
Moni the situation after the resignation made it particularly painful. I had to face common everyday lives and memories everywhere. It was necessary to buy new coffee cups, for example. I also wonder if there should be a change. Last summer was so hard I can’t remember anything about it.
Sometimes I wonder, that I have already emerged, but then sorrow struck again facing hyperplasia. However, I decided not to do anything that would ultimately only make me feel worse. I wanted to stay put and go through the pain, let the emotions come and go. Gradually, the painful memories have been replaced by corrective experiences and life has moved on.
Not long ago, I looked at our terrace, where I meditated so damn last year because of the difference. Came to feel that the joke, I live here and I am still survived. Still, I still feel confused about what happened. It has affected my ability to trust people and I still find it hard to sleep and relax with a new person because it triggers in my body memories of the time after the difference when I woke up all the time.
I urge all those who have been left to ask for help and support from other people. To me, the professionals said I treat it like “shock death”. It’s good to remember that this is really a big deal. You just have to go through all your emotions, including anger, but at the same time remember that it didn’t happen to determine your own dignity. It’s good to find your own thing to release emotions out of your body.
For those left close, I hope for the ability to empathize. There is no need to help another by force. I myself meant to go nervous when I got advice without asking.
Today, I already feel like I’m ready for love again.
Emmi Asikainen, yentrepreneur and student
Source site www.is.fi